I haven't written in a while. Boo! And I have missed it. Asking for more responsibility at work means only one thing... You get it! And with that, comes a lot less down time, and exhaustion after work. The only things I have been doing consistently are going to bed early and watching Netflix. Beyond that, I can barely bring myself to want to go to Target after work. Which is weird, because I always, always go to Target. Like once or twice a week...
I digress. Motivation is something that seems to hit the most when you don't have the time to do anything, or, more specifically, the energy (Thank you Diabetes for taking all my energy). I am motivated by SO MUCH! There are so many things I want and would love to do! I just can't seem to grasp the 'thing' that will allow me to jump in head first.
Somethings that hold me back: fear of judgement, fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of lacking. These are the things that keep us all from doing what we wish we could do. What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail? Let me write you a list! Fear, you suck! But you are also so real.
So I thought I would turn to the blog to ramble. And what do I love the most? Literature. I love reading. It is always my number one thing when asked what I like to do. I could read for 100 hours in a row and love every second. I have been known to lose sleep around a good book, and that's okay with me! I tends to be the one thing that I am willing to lose sleep over (much to my boyfriend's chagrin since he wants to watch movies and eat ice cream until 2am)!
Well! I want to be the reason someone stays up late at night, the reason someone find courage in a horrible situation, the reason some one laughs out loud, or cries, or changes their goal in life because a book character did. I want to write a book!
Reading all the time, I have developed a little bit of knowledge about what works and what doesn't in a book. For example, if there isn't enough back story, the reader can't connect with the characters, however if there is too much back story, the readers can't connect with the story. How to achieve the perfect balance, not impossible, but not easy. I am not a writer. I love the idea of being a great writer, I love that so many people are good at it, and I really enjoyt that there isn't a limit to writing. You can create your own world, realm, universe and it is solely yours. I have my reality, I have my main character. However, I don't think I have enough yet to make a story. I am just getting to know her. We have only hung out a few times. But I can see us getting deeper and deeper as our relationship blooms.
So, I am hoping this is a great something that I can work towards. I have been in need of a new personal computer, so I believe that is something I will work towards. Right now, I only have my boyfriends desktop computer and I don't like it. He is so generous to let me use it, but it just doesn't feel like mine. I don't think he would snoop, or even cares what I do on there, but I would just feel more comfortable if it were mine.
Okay! Ramblings complete...